Ok, so it's not exactly a country western song...probably more like a Geritol commercial actually! But this is my life...
I will admit that I DO think the Prednisone regime that Dr. She Who Will Not Be Named suggested has helped the post Tysabri infusion arthralgia. But if you throw in a monthly surge of hormones (sorry guys...it just happens!) on top of an already arthritic system, the outcome DOES feel like something songs could be written about.
This morning, I once again had quite the ordeal just getting out of bed and NOT just because it was a lovely Sunday morning to sleep in. It is a matter of habit for me now to always stretch my calves before trying to stand or walk...the morning spasticity in my legs remains a constant...this is just a given. But when I tried to push myself up out of the bed, my lower back began to scream obscenities at me...this is never a good way to start one's day by being yelled at from body parts.
So, being the mature adult I am, I returned the cries of my lower back with a few choice "obscenities" from my mouth shoved between grunts and groans and a few vocal, "Ouches". I couldn't for the life of me determine WHAT was causing this growing and intense pain above my arse. And to make matters worse, I was having strange electrical sensations shooting down my thighs, causing me increasing anxiety and wonderment as to what was the cause (neuro vs. neurotic?...nerve problems versus making something up in my brain?...these are the things I worry about).
Finally, after trying to win the pain over with brute force and then my "charismatic charm", I headed for the Ibuprofen bottle (the very one I wanted to shoot a hole in just a few nights ago!) and popped a few of my little, brown friends...I really don't know WHY I didn't just concede to this plan sooner...I'm not always the most "pragmatic" when in pain I guess!
I then headed straight for the couch and fell into a bizarre slumber with the sound of an NFL football game emitting from the television set. I say bizarre sleep because I had a near nightmarish dream about my middle sister giving my bedroom away to a visiting stranger! Then as I was trying to get up a flight of stairs while arguing the unfairness of the situation to my sister, a banister broke and I teetered on a landing ready to fall just before I awakened...I'm not keen on falling dreams and I'm certainly NOT keen on helplessly arguing with my sister!
When I finally oriented myself from my startled slumber, I had a very difficult time "coming to"...the feelings of the dream swirled inside me and I just wanted to go back to sleep to "dream it right". No such luck. I continued to remain on the couch in a semi-fugue state, but with a bit less noticeable pain in my back...I also noticed the electrical sensations had lessened.
Eventually and in the later afternoon, I rallied...I bathed, I did the hygiene things, I ate, I even watched the Seahawks embarrassing loss to the Minn. Vikings...I started to feel more "normal"...whatever THAT is.
I also began to remember the "monthly" symptoms I usually get and the symptoms that seem to worsen every menstrual cycle...nope, this wasn't a relapse coming on, I wasn't losing my mind (although I'm sure some might want to debate that!), and the Tysabri arthralgia wasn't getting worse. I was just HAPPILY HORMONAL!
The good news (if you can call it that) is, this will all pass in 24 hours or so and I will return to my REGULAR neurotic and neuralgic self...the bad news is, I may never get a chance to tell my sister off in my dreams again! She WAS wrong in my dream you know and I so seldom get to prove I'm right...drat and double drat...