Sometimes Doing The "Right" Thing Is The Hardest Thing To Do...

     I returned to see the Gut Doctor yesterday...thousands of dollars of tests revealed I have that age old Irritable Bowel Disease and nothing more.  I could have told him I was irritable without all the tests. LOL

     We discussed treatment options, which mostly included medications I'm not willing to take at this time...it just seems dangerous to throw another pill into the cesspool of chemicals already floating around in my system.  The "other" treatment option is to clean up my act...a much easier thing said than done.

     It always seems the hardest hurdles for me to jump in my life tend to be the ones that appear on the surface, the easiest.  "Cleaning up my act" would consist of better living...of eating a more proper diet, cutting out caffeine, exercising regularly, getting enough sleep, losing some weight, and decreasing my stress.  All of these things come in NON-PILL form and cost me nothing financially.  All of these things require little more from me than a change in mindset.  So why are they the hardest things to do?

     I'd like to be able to blame my "Inertia Interuptus" on Multiple Sclerosis...after all, most of my physicians use my MS as a catch-all for every other symptom.  But I think I suffered from "II" even BEFORE I was diagnosed with MS...I think "II" has been in my life working behind the scenes for a looong time!

     For someone who spends her work hours committing the mentally ill, I have realized I am truly a "commitaphobe" in my own life.  I don't like to commit to anything...I don't like change...I prefer to run my race with no obstacles.

     Unfortunately, the track of my life has become lined with multiple hurdles and it's getting harder and harder to move in the direction of the finishline without attempting to leap some of the bars in front of me.  And I'm too far down the track to even think of turning around...I've halfway begun the race and I'm halfway finished.

     As a behaviorist, I DO believe in the Amoeba theory...organisms will attempt to escape painful stimulus.  But just like the Amoeba, they may not move UNTIL there is a painful stimulus...I've essentially become an amoeba and my tolerance to what I perceive as pain has increased dramatically!

     I've lived with the symptoms of IBS for several years now...I've grown accustomed to my crazy bowel problems...I've become desensitized to the issue...the "pain" of the situation just isn't great enough to warrant movement away from it.  What an unfortunate place to find myself, but not uncomfortable (painful) enough to cause me to want to move away from the problem.  I suffer from a severe case of Inertia Interuptus.

     I don't have a lot of well thought out suggestions for overcoming II...if I did, I'd most likely be DOING the suggestions myself.  But if you also suffer from II (which by the way, IS a made up diagnosis!), perhaps you might have some words of wisdom for the comment section of this blog that might support those of us with this debilitating disease...that is, if the II suffers can bring themselves to reading it...