Tuesday, September 5, 2006

I Fear I Am Contagious...Or Something...

     I awoke this morning BEFORE the obnoxious sound of my alarm clock...thank goodness.  There's nothing I hate more (OK, maybe one or two things I hate more) than having to wake up to an alarm clock, reminding me I obviously didn't get enough sleep or I'd AlREADY be awake!

     The alarm was set to wake me up in preparation for my return to see the Gut Doctor.  I've been a bit nervous about this appointment anyway because, as usual, I have not followed the Gut Doctor's instructions...I'm NOT taking the anti-cholinergic medication he prescribed for my colon blow problem.  Don't get me wrong...I DID "try" it.  But the side effects from the Levbid made me feel worse than the chronic diarrhea (too much information?!?), so I stopped it...not surprised, eh?  LOL

     After one dose of the Levbid, my palms/feet became swollen balls of sweat, I was dizzy, my throat felt like someone had swiped a piece of sandpaper through it, and I couldn't seem to wake up...I ended up sleeping for several hours during the DAY, which is something I just don't do.  Meha (AKA Kitty Ho) thoroughly enjoyed my somnulence, however...she took full advantage of my supine stupor and napped peacefully on my chest while I left out-of-control drool marks on my fine Egyptian Cotton pillow covers.

     The Gut Doctor doesn't really know me well (to his advantage, I'm certain!)...he's only seen me three times and the second one of those visuals was with me stoned on Verced, butt up, and viewing into the unexplored spaces of my bowel.  We didn't talk much during our second visit, or at least I HOPE I didn't say much at all! LOL  So he really has not experienced the true force of my non-compliant nature...my tornado winds of "NO, I don't want to do/take/talk/have/experience that".  And because I don't know HIM well at all either, I simply wasn't looking forward to this recent medical confession of non-compliance with his drug prescription.

     Because I work many evenings in my job AND because my sleep is so precious to me when I DO finally get a few winks, I turn my phones off at night.  After doing my morning bed ballet to ensure my walking capabilities, I flipped the phone on to discover I had a message waiting from the Gut Doctor's nurse...two messages actually. 

     Nurse Cathy was frantically trying to reach me to cancel my late morning gastro appointment because the Gut Doctor is quite ill.  It seems he partied his Labor Day Weekend in Canada and has been violently ill for the past few days...perhaps he smoked one too many Cuban cigars or something...who knows.  Whatever the cause, he is/was too sick to come to work today.

     I actually breathed a sigh of relief.  I don't wish illness on anyone, but the Gut Doctor's timely sickness was music to my ears.  I got to reschedule my appointment to next week, thus postponing my eventual disclosure of non-compliance, oddly feeling like a "lucky break" was had.  LOL

     After I hung up the phone with Nurse Cathy, I started putting a few thoughts together and realized my neurologist is ALSO out with a "pain in the neck" surgery this week.  Now, as far as I know, my team of other providers is alive and well, but I really haven't checked in to verify this claim and, frankly, I'm a bit nervous to find out the answer.  What if another practitioner on "Team LD" is also ill?  What if there's some cosmic force of connection to MOI that is dropping them like flies?  What if I'm contagious???

     I suppose I could insert evil laugh #3 here (the "mooohahahaha" one) and relish in the idea I could have such great influence or power over others, but even I'm not THAT grandiose.  Or I could worry that I have chosen a team of weaklings to represent my health needs, but that's not been my experience either.

     Once again, the reality of the human experience has set in and I accept the fact my doctors/practitioners are human...they get sick just like I do...I believe they even put on their underwear just like I do, although I've never cared or wanted to monitor this hypothesis myself. LOL  I DO sometimes wonder if they prescribe and treat themselves or if they seek outside consult for their ailments, however.  I wonder if they follow their doctor's prescriptions to a tee or if they veer down paths of recovery based on their own clinical knowledge?  I wonder if they REALLY disclose everything they are doing or feeling when having a check up?  Somehow I doubt it.

     I wonder if they tolerate me because they recognize their OWN non-compliant selves in my presentation?  Hmmm......

1 comment:

sonyasuzanne said...

I'm certain your medical knowledge hasn't allowed you to pick a medical team of weaklings....Moi' on the other hand.....I'm thinking I've blown it.  

yup, my day has been grouchy with me to say the least....Bless my heart!


Moi' in less than hospitable Chicago burbs